You'd think I would have learned by now. You'd think I would know when to stop myself. You'd think I would know better. But yet I continue to expose myself to horrible reality dating television shows. My wife was out of town earlier this week and at nighttime, when we usually watch shows together, I found myself going back to older sitcoms I liked. I watched "The League" and "Workaholics" with regularity. But since she is home, and she is not that big a fan of those shows, I usually let her pick what we watch. Well last night that meant I watched a show called "FBoy Island" on HBO Max.

I had no idea what this show was. I have never heard of it. I figured I was done with any reality dating show after seeing "Too Hot to Handle". Hell, I figured most people were done with reality dating shows after reading reviews of "THTH" and "Sexy Beasts". That is clearly not the case. My wife said that some of her work friends had told her about this show and she wanted to check it out. I also read, after we watched, that HBO Max claimed this show had one of the highest streaming numbers since HBO Max has been in existence.

My simple one word question for this show, why it is on, why this was made, why is it being watched so much is, why? Why do we constantly let stuff like this keep getting made. I understand that reality TV is so much cheaper and easier to do, but at this point the people involved are just so goddamn lazy. I mean, "THTH" puts a bunch of idiots in a house and tries to entice them with money to not physically express their attraction to one another. "Sexy Beasts" is a rip off of a British dating show where they have people go on blind dates in movie makeup. At least these shows have some semblance of a narrative. It is a stupid narrative, but it is there nonetheless. But "FBoy Island" is just stupid and insidious and boring and unfunny and absurd and flat out dumb.

This is, by far, the worst of any of these new COVID era dating shows that I have seen. It bums me out that Nikki Glaser is involved with this show too. I like her. She is a very funny comedian. She has proven to be a solid actor. She even tried to be on "Dancing with the Stars". She is a Saint Louis native. This show, "FBoy Island", is so beneath her. She does not need to do this. I'm sure the pay is good and it let her go on a trip to the Cayman Islands during the ongoing pandemic, but she is way too talented to host a shit show like this. In the premiere episode she was making solid jokes, but the moronic contestants didn't get them, probably because they are not smart enough, and it was a waste. Then the show is 1 hour long. I mean come on. That is 59 minutes and 59 seconds too long. To sit there, and I watched the whole thing, for an hour and just watch these idiots be idiotic, it was such a slog. This show needs to be, at most, 20 minutes long.

Let’s talk about the contestants. They got what I would describe as the worst of the worst. These people are just trying to get their 15 minutes of fame. They have no substance. There is nothing to like about them. When they would flash their jobs next to their names things like "exotic dancer/realtor" or "influencer" or "cbd entrepreneur" or "childcare/tik tok" or "fridge delivery man" would pop up and I would constantly yell, "THAT ISN'T A JOB!!!!!!". I was so enraged by this. I was furious at this whole show. Everything about it is so dumb. It is the worst type of TV show in the country. These are truly awful people who should never be given a platform to have millions of people hear them talk.

I have to ask, have we learned nothing since 2016? Did we all just forget about the horribleness of 2016? When that horrific monster was somehow the "president"? Now that we have an actual good guy in the White House, why hasn't reality dating TV made the change? I know that is a detour, but come the hell on. This show is filled with people that probably voted for that monster, or did not vote at all. All these "F Boys"(fuck boys for those that do not know) are truly the douchiest of all the douchebags. As for the supposed "nice guys", they seem pretty terrible too.

"FBoy Island" is terrible. I do not recommend this show. I will not be watching anymore of it. I don't even care to know what "Limbro" is, which is where they dropped off the first F boy that was kicked off the show. This show is so, so, so, so bad. Don't waste your time.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

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