Time for a Dad Hat

I have made no bones about how much I love being a dad, and a stay at home parent on this site, and on our pod. It is the best job in the world, I get to dress however in the hell I want, I don't mind the stares, or the "it is so nice of you to give mom a day off" comments, I love being there for major milestones, it is amazing. But, there are some things that I have successfully been able to avoid that are cliché dad things.

What stuff? Things like mowing the lawn and admiring it. Sure, I mow the lawn, but it is more for the workout than looking at a freshly shorn lawn. I like to grill, but I do not consider myself an expert griller, I don't have my own tongs, and I ask for help from anyone willing to give advice. I used to wear cargo shorts, back in my high school days, but I have not since revisited that in my years as a dad. I actually wear Columbia all weather type shorts now. They're great, and I love that they have built in netting so I can swim in them, and then continue my day without having to switch to cargo shorts. I also don't have too much to carry around anymore, just my keys, wallet and phone. So, I don't need cargo shorts. I am very proud to say that I have never, nor will I ever, wear New Balance shoes. Look, my dad wears them, I'm sure one, if not all three, of my brothers wear them (ed note: Hell no I do not wear New Balance), and I know that I have at home dad friends that wear them as well. I just don't like them on a personal level. I think they look too bulky, the few pairs I have tried on were very uncomfortable, they have no flash and I don't think they are as good a running shoe as some would like me to believe. I'm an Altra man as I stated awhile back.

But, I did finally cave to a dad trope yesterday. One I have actually avoided for a bit now, but I finally gave in, and I have to say, I love it.

I got my first "dad hat". For those that may not know, a "dad hat" is made of a material akin to a cotton shirt, they are distressed, they have an open back, but it is not a snapback, and you really only see dad's, or people that look like dad's, wearing them. I almost bought one at a Run the Jewels show a few years back, but I hesitated. I wish I hadn't, because that hat was dope as hell. But, now that I am a Suns fan I decided that I needed some team gear. I went on Amazon, found a great deal on a Suns hat, and it just happened to be a "dad hat". I bought it, and waited for it to arrive. It got here yesterday, and I immediately put it on my head and was astounding at how much I liked the feel and fit. It was just perfect. I love the distressed feel. It feels like I have worn it for awhile. It didn't need the breaking in that a snap back or fitted hat needs. The back was way, way better than I expected. I am a fitted hat fan way more than snapback, so this was my biggest concern. But to have the material be the same as the hat, unlike a snapback that is plastic, is great. You don't feel it push into the back of your head like a snap back. The bill was already bent like I like it, so that was another plus. And the look, I love. It fits almost too good. I have not taken it off since I got it, except when I eat meals, or go to bed. I even wore it backwards a ton yesterday and today, and that is great. I used to wear hats backwards a lot when I was a kid, but as I get older, I am more prone to wear my hat forward. But with the "dad hat", wearing it backwards was great. It has a good look. The slouch makes it look fine, at least to me. It was awesome.

So, while I have denied, and will continue to deny, that I am getting older, and turning more and more into a father everyday, including "dad hat's" and dad jokes now, I have to say that this is one thing I am happy to take on as a dad and older guy now. "Dad hat's" rule, and if you are older and on the fence about buying one, don't. You will love it. I know I love mine.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. Up next for Ty’s dad life? How about a copy of Sports by Huey Lewis and the News?

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The Joys of Being a Stay at Home Dad

a warning to us all

Happy Father's Day. In honor of all dads out there we are reprinting one of Ty's epic tales of parenthood. Enjoy

Let me tell you about my life.

About two years ago my wife and I sat down to have a talk. We had a one year old son at the time, he's three now, and all of the money I was making at my job was going straight to daycare. Literally, every single cent. When my wife did our financial budget, she found this out. So, that talk led to us making the decision for me to stay at home with our child and be the primary caregiver. I was officially becoming a stay at home dad. I was thrilled.

That's not to say I didn't enjoy my job. Quite the opposite. I worked in a dental lab making partial dentures for people. It was challenging and rewarding. I liked everyone that I worked with. I just wasn't making that much money. When I went to put my two weeks in, after the conversation, they couldn't offer me anymore more, and they understood my decision completely. It was as easy a "break up" as I ever had. In fact, I'm still friends with my former co workers and I still see them occasionally. But, my last day at my "office" job was the beginning of my new, totally fulfilling stay at home dad job.

Don't get it twisted though, being the primary caregiver is hard and can be frustrating and a struggle more times than not. But, the rewards totally outweigh the risks. Think about it. I get to see my kids reach their milestones before anyone else. I'm there when they begin to crawl. I'm there when they first start to talk gibberish. I'm there when they take their first steps. I'm there for everything and it's tremendous. My wife is also the greatest person in the world for, not only kicking ass at her job and constantly climbing the corporate ladder, but being fine with the fact that I stay home. She goes to her job everyday and is awesome at it. Without that, we wouldn't be this lucky. She's awesome.

Now, the struggle came to me early on. At first, it was just me and my son. We would go to the zoo, science center, multiple playgrounds, basically, anything that was free. It was a lot of fun, but I spent my entire "work" day talking to a two year old. That can be very frustrating. My son is very smart, but he can't give me the type of conversation that the adults at my job could. That's not his fault, he's a toddler. So, it would get lonely until my wife would get home.

About a year ago I joined a meet up group of dads that were and are the primary caregivers as well. This was fantastic. I heard about the group from another stay at home dad whose daughter was going to kindergarten, so he didn't have the time to go to the meet ups anymore. I joined immediately and have loved every second of being part of this group. I get to interact with adults again. It may only be one or two days a week, but it's just what I needed. It's just as great for my son too because he's made new friends. He gets to play with kids around his age, and I get to hang out with adults. It's terrific. I suggest if you're a new stay at home parent, find one of these groups, it is completely to your benefit. I got into a groove with my son.

We had a great routine going, but my wife and I were expecting another child. We now have a five and a half week old daughter. She's the light of my life, but mine and my son's routine is shot. My wife is home on maternity leave as well, which is great, but it also crushed our routine. I know when she gets back to work and as my daughter gets to be 4, 5 and 6 months old, we will get back in a new routine, but I do miss our old routine. It was great. Having a new kid also has me scared yet excited for what it will be like with a new kid, and a girl at that.

Staying home has been the best decision my wife and I have made. It's benefited not only us, but our kids as well. We know what kind of care they're getting 24/7 and that's very comforting. I've also been able to take a part time job coaching young kids in multiple sports. I wouldn't be able to do that if I still had an office job. I love being a stay at home dad and I love that it's becoming more common place. It's nice to be part of a big group of dads that do the same thing and seen the same things that I do. If you can and have the means to, I highly recommend having a parent stay home with the kids. It's awesome and more acceptable now if it is the father. Sure, I get sideways looks at playgrounds sometimes, or people will say, " it's nice you took the day off to play with your kids". If that's the only trouble I run into, I can deal with that, no problem.

I have the best job in the world.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man podcast. He used to wash out inflatable bounce houses for a living, but an unfortunate clown shaped one ended his career. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.