"The Program" Lives on as a Cheesy Sports Melodrama
/A few weeks back I wrote a piece about my love of 90's sports movies, mainly kids sports movies. I was a kid back then, I love sports and these were right in my wheelhouse. I mentioned a bunch of movies I loved from that era, but most of them were comedic in nature. I do like a bunch of dramatic sports movies as well, but comedy is always my go to option.
For date night this past week it was my choice to pick the movie. Since I am in this rewatch era of old sports movies I loved, I stayed on that trend, picking "The Program". My wife asked me what it was about and I told her it comes off as a hard drama about the ills of running a college football team. She made a face, but I told her it is funny how melodramatic the movie comes off. That perked her up and we proceeded to watch.
I want to say, right off the bat, this movie still rules. I loved every second of it. It felt as good to watch it as a 40 year old as it did when it came out when I was 12 years old. I also realized that I shouldn't have been watching this movie when I was 12, but I turned out just fine. But what makes this movie so rewatchable, what I still love about it to this day, is the melodrama. This movie takes itself far too seriously. There are so many scenes that end in fights, or realizations, or finding one self, or having to deal with consequences. I swear, the ending of almost every scene has one of these cliches tacked on. A guy on the team takes steroids and his team chastises him for it, but they don't kick him off. He then sexually assaults a coed on campus, and they only suspend him. It isn't until the second time he is caught with steroids do they kick him off the team, but only after he makes a season saving tackle. That is absurd. One of the only decent people in the movie gets all of his glory taken away from him due to a clean block that destroys his leg. Alvin Mack had everything in front of him, he was going to make millions in the NFL, but then his leg got obliterated by a pulling guard who he was shit talking. Then they pan to his house and I swear to you his family lives in the 1800's. That was totally unnecessary and undeserving. But when you watch "The Program", that is almost expected. The tutor, played by Halle Berry, is in a love triangle with the vet running back and the hot shot running back recruit. And she gets everyone involved in this triangle. And the resolution is laugh out loud funny. The QB, who also happens to be a Heisman candidate, is a drunk. He also likes to say he "lives life on the edge". He rides a motorcycle and goes to rehab. He gets a girlfriend and treats her like dirt. But not to worry, she is still completely into him. I also appreciate that he cannot beat Michigan in this movie. But this QB's story might be the most melodramatic thing I've ever seen in a sports movie. It is wild. The coach's daughter sleeps with the backup QB and takes his tests. The coach finds out and is pissed, but when his star QB goes to rehab, again, hilarious, the coach has to vouch for this backup in front of the school board. That scene is meant to be serious, but I can't help but to laugh every time I see it. I mean I could go on and on and on.
This movie is so of its time. From the fashion to the choice of actors to the dialogue, it has the early 90's all over it. James Caan gives it his all, but he cannot save this movie from the melodrama. Halle Berry is the best part, outside of the football action, but she has horrible dialogue to work with, and I feel like the director just let her do her own thing. Look, I love this movie. I will watch it a bunch more. I found it incredibly watchable on this go round. But it has so many faults, mainly the melodrama.
I highly recommend you all check it out. It will take you back and make you laugh. "The Program", for being a sports drama, is hilarious and kind of stupid. And that is why I adore this movie.
Ty
Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.
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