Ty Watches "Bottoms"

Over the weekend I was finally able to see the movie "Bottoms". I remember previews for this and wanting to see it. I remember it getting very good reviews after it was released and wanting to see it even more. I remember hearing possible awards buzz surrounding the movie and wanting to see it the most. But time got away from me. The winter is the busiest time for me as far as coaching and dad duty goes. But, we had a date night, it was my turn to pick the movie and "Bottoms" was streaming on Amazon Prime for free. So we watched.

I loved this movie. I laughed at this more than most comedies that have come out in the past four or five years. The basic plot is, two nerdy, gay high school girls start a fight club to meet their crushes. That is the short version. But there is so much more on screen. First off, this is a high school spoof of a movie. When I looked up the cast, no actor was younger than 20 years old. But this was a situation where you could tell it was done with intention. The creators wanted actors that looked young, but we all know that they are not very young. This made some of the stuff we watched even funnier.

Ayo Edibiri and Rachel Sennott are the leads, and they are perfect. Sennott is the more outgoing, funny and talkative one. But, she will never be confused as a "cool" kid. Edebiri is more soft spoken. She doesn't want any trouble. She just wants to get to college. These two are sensational. When they finally get alone with their crushes, I was stoked, and then devastated for Sennott's character. These two used to be college roommates, and you can tell from their electric chemistry on screen. Sennott really keeps your attention when she talks. And the moments where Edibiri gives a speech, or does a monologue, are pretty powerful. They filled the cast with other actors that I don't really know. The crushes are played by Havana Rose Liu, this is the first thing I've seen her in, and Kaia Gerber, Cindy Crawford's daughter. They were excellent. Ruby Cruz is the one who kind of gets the whole fight club going. She was funny and had a solid arc. Punkie Johnson plays Edibiri's wild aunt who lives in a trailer. Zamani Wilder, Summer Joy Campbell and Virginia Tucker are members of the fight club, and all three bring some hilarious traits. The football players, namely Nicholas Galitzine and Miles Fowler, are wonderfully goofy. The whole stuff with the QB, Jeff, is riotous. And then we have Marshawn Lynch. What a star-making performance from him. He is hilarious, he pretty much improvised all of his lines, he took this role to make up for the way he reacted to his sister coming out, and he absolutely crushed. They took a chance and they were paid off tremendously by his performance. All of the actors did a wonderful job.

What most impressed me was the writing. This is an absurd movie, but it is absurd in all the best ways. The spoof of the football team's importance landed perfectly. The way teachers and administrators behave was tremendously done. How the main characters arc from nerdom to popularity and back to nerdom paid off. I was overly impressed with how well thought out and how simply insane the movie came across on screen. We need more comedies like this.

"Bottoms" is just as good as "Booksmart" and "Superbad". I actually think I may like it a bit more because of the presence of Ayo Edibiri and how ridiculous it is supposed to be. I definitely recommend watching this movie. It is very funny and very good. 

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast.

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Ty Ranks the 2016 NFL Teams: Shirt Fresh Out of the Dryer Edition

It's a new week, so that means we are back to my NFL countdown. I started last week with the worst and worked my way all the way to 4 teams that have a legitimate shot at making the playoffs this year by the end of the week. Starting today, I have 12 total teams left, so we are near the cream of the crop of the NFL. Today, I even have some division winners. I also have a few surprise teams, based on where I have them ranked. This is the good part of the NFL. These last 12 teams are all hyper competitive, and they have full fledged stars, and up and coming super talents. Okay, on with the countdown.

Coming in at number 12, I have the Indianapolis Colts. This team was ravaged by injuries last year, namely to Andrew Luck. I really think Luck is a great NFL QB. He is going to take that next step to the upper level, and I think it will happen this season, if he stays healthy. He had a ruptured spleen last year, and you could tell just by watching that he was in some serious pain. The fact that he even played as many games as he did was remarkable. The problem with Luck though, he does take way too many chances and that causes costly errors. The Colts also don't really have a running game. Yeah, they signed Frank Gore last year, but he was past his prime a few years back. He is still serviceable, but not the threat he once was. He still grinds out tough yards, but he has no break away speed anymore, not that he ever really had any at all. Gore also doesn't have that great of a line to run behind either. They also don't protect Luck all that well, he was sacked a lot last season, when he played. What the Colts do have, besides Luck, is a decent group of wideouts. T.Y. Hilton has become a household name for NFL fans. He is a deep threat, but he is also a very good possession receiver. They also have Donte Moncrief, who is a taller version of Hilton, just not as polished yet. They also have the ageless wonder, Deion Branch at receiver. He is old, but he is still good. The Colts have names on defense, but the results are not there yet. The defense has guys like Robert Mathis, Vontae Davis and D'Qwell Jackson, who are all good, but they still give up a lot of points. If the defense can shore it up, they have the talent to be in the top 10 of the league. They do also have the best kicker, maybe in the history of the NFL, in Adam Vinateiri. He is as automatic as they come. The Colts should win their division. As I said last week, the Texans and Jaguars are coming, but the Colts still have Andrew Luck. I say they rebound from last year, go 11-5 and win the division.

At number 11, I have the Kansas City Chiefs. The Chiefs may be the most milquetoast team in all of football, but they win games. Andy Reid is a very good regular season head coach, so this team can always put together a very competitive team, they just don't win playoff games. Alex Smith may be the best game manager QB in the NFL. He makes the check down play a bit too much, but he usually makes the right throw. He very rarely gets picked off, which is huge for this team. Jamaal Charles, when he is healthy, is one of the best backs in the league. He's fast, he's shifty and when he is the open field, forget about trying to catch him, he's gone. But, he does get injured a ton. He has torn ACL's, suffered multiple concussions and gets nicks and bruises all the time. They have a good tight end in Travis Kelce, but he is a very poor man's version of Gronk. He doesn't have the size and speed or the hands of Gronk, but he is a reliable tight end. The Chiefs finally have a good receiver in Jeremy Maclin. He is very fast and has good hands. But, much like Charles, Maclin gets hurt a lot. He also alligator arms passes sometimes, leading me to believe that he doesn't like contact. But, he is still a very good receiver. Other than Maclin though, the Chiefs are thin at receiver. On the other side of the ball, the Chiefs are very stout. They have great players on defense with guys like Derrick Williams, Donatari Poe, Eric Berry, Justin Houston, Marcus Peters and Tamba Hali, amongst others. The Chiefs defense can get pressure, stop the run and cover the pass. The Chiefs are good, but they are the third best defense in their own conference, that's the problem. The Chiefs division is very, very good. I say they finish 10-6, but that will only good enough for third and they will miss out on the playoffs.

Coming in at number 10, I have my biggest mover from last season, the Oakland Raiders. Now, before you laugh this team off, they have gotten really good the past couple of seasons, and they have done most of it through the draft. First off, I think Derek Carr is a very serviceable QB right now, but I believe that he will become one of the better QB's in the league very soon. He has a great arm, makes good choices most of the time, and finally has some threats at the skill positions. Derek Carr is one of the better draft choices that the Raiders have made in a long, long time. Another great draft pick they made happened last year when they took Amari Cooper. Cooper proved in his rookie year that he was as advertised. He does the dirty work, i.e., going over the middle and jumping up for poorly thrown balls. Cooper also has speed, runs great routes and finds open spaces all over the field. Amari Cooper is awesome. They also have Michael Crabtree, who is still a very viable receiver, when he has a good QB. At running back, they looked thin, but Latavius Murray really showed up last year when they needed a good running back. He runs hard and grinds out yards. Their offensive line is also very, quietly, good. But, this Raiders defense is on the verge of being one of the top defenses in the NFL. They are so good, so fast, attack the other team, and they aren't dirty about it anymore. The defense is led by another great draft pick, Khalil Mack. Mack is so, so good. He is a dominant linebacker. He can tackle, he can cover and he is the leader of this unit when they are on the field, and he excels at all these things. They also signed Bruce Irvin this offseason away from Seattle, and now he is teaming up with Mack. Oof, that is a devastating duo at linebacker. They also have a good defensive line and secondary, but this defense is led by the linebackers, as defenses should be. I really like what the Raiders have done, I hope they don't move to Las Vegas, and they've done most of it through the draft. This team is good, and they should win 11 games this year, and compete for a playoff spot, but it will be from the wild card. I really enjoy this Raiders team.

At number 9, which is a fall for them, I have the Seattle Seahawks. I kind of feel that the shine is off this Seahawks team. They don't seem to be as dominant as they were 2 years ago. I feel that some people on their team, Russell Wilson, have let their ego get in the way of their game. Wilson was a fine game manager, but when he was the QB of a Super Bowl championship, I feel like he got way too much credit, and he let that get to his head. you could see it in his play last year. He tried to make throws that he can't possibly make. He also started to blame everyone else on the team for his short comings. Wilson is a slightly better version of Colin Kaepernick, he just happened to be on a team with one of the greatest defenses of all time. Then, they let Marshawn Lynch essentially walk away for nothing because he and Wilson couldn't coexist. They chose the QB over, at the time, the best running back in the league. I know Lynch was hurt a lot last year, but when he was in, he was great. Then, they struck gold with Thomas Rawls, who was a revelation, but he broke his ankle. The running back position is a big, big problem for this team, and they rely on the run more than any other NFL team. At receiver, they have just okay players. Tyler Lockett and Doug Baldwin are fine, but they are just kind of blah to me. They have Jimmy Graham, but they use him more for blocking than receiving, and that is not his strength. He is not a good blocker at all, but he is an all world receiver. They need to figure out how to use him properly. Their o line stinks as well. They simply cannot protect anyone. The defense is still good, but people have figured out how to neutralize their weapons. They lost Bruce Irvin, but they still have Bobby Wagner and KJ Wright. They are fine, but they are not Bruce Irvin. They do have a good d line, with guys like Michael Bennett and Cliff Avril. They can stop the run, but their days of pressuring the QB seem to be gone. The secondary is the best part of their defense, but it is not the "Legion of Boom"(what a stupid, self proclaimed nickname) anymore. Richard Sherman is great, but not like he was a few years ago. He gets beat deep more now, and he doesn't put fear in opposing QB's like he used to. Earl Thomas is a very good safety, but he also has lost a step or two over the past couple of years. Brandon Browner, in my opinion, has become a better over all cornerback than Richard Sherman, but no one talks about him. But, the cream of the crop in the secondary is Kam Chancellor. He is a great hitter and ball hawk. Chancellor may be one of the best secondary players in all the NFL. The Seahawks can still win this porous division, but they will probably only win 10 games. They still have a very stout defense, which will keep them in games, but the offense is not as good as some will lead you to believe, and they will continue to regress. Also, Pete Carroll is not as good a coach as some writers think he is.

Come back tomorrow for the next four teams.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. His dislike for the Seahawks is legendary, but he will still give credit where it is due. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.

Millennial Memories From a Decade Plus Worth of Super Bowls

Many of our memories are of the food being better than the game.

With Super Bowl 50 just around the corner, I want to look back at some Super Bowl memories that I have had over the past decade plus. I've watched a lot of football in that period of time and I have some good and not so good memories of Super Bowl's past. I know that I wouldn't get the exact Super Bowl number, so I will just describe some teams and some of the games that I remember and I'm sure that most people would be able to pick the game I'm talking about. First, I want to go back to the early to mid nineties. Those Super Bowl's are some of my very first memories of realizing that this is a big game. I don't so much remember the games, but I remember moments and, more importantly, teams.

First of all, I was a big time band wagon fan when I was a child. Whichever team won the Super Bowl, that was my favorite team and the team I remember being on the bandwagon for the Dallas Cowboys of the mid 90's. Looking back on it now, I despise this team, but when I was a kid, they were the champs, so I rooted for the champs. If I could go back in time, I'd yell at the young me for being a fan of this team. They were so arrogant and so flamboyant, and as I've gotten older, I'm all about "acting like you've been there before". I don't need flash, just score a TD, give the ball to the ref and go to the sideline. That's why I like Barry Sanders so much. That Cowboys team though, save for Troy Aikman and Emmitt Smith, were all about flash. I loved it as a kid, but as an adult, I don't care for it. But, that Cowboys team, for a young football fan, was so easy to like and say you were a fan.

The team I should have stuck up for back then was the Buffalo Bills. They played the game the way it was supposed to be played, but added that up tempo, no huddle offense. They were a ton of fun to watch and I liked Jim Kelly and Thurman Thomas just as much, if not more, than Aikman and Smith. The Bills also had one of my all time favorite players, Bruce Smith. But, they couldn't get over the hump, especially against the Cowboys. The Bills were the only team to make four straight Super Bowls, and they lost all four of them, three via blowouts. Everyone remembers Scott Norwood and wide right, but what I remember most about those Bills-Cowboys Super Bowls, was Don Beebe chasing down Leon Lett and striping the ball out of his hands. That game was an absolute blow out, but Beebe still wouldn't throw in the towel and after chasing Lett down and stripping the ball, John Madden said something that I will never forget, "Don Beebee is the fastest white guy in the NFL". At the time, I thought it was weird and if a commentator said something like that now, it would be a huge deal all over the internets.

Moving on to more modern Super Bowl memories, I remember when the Rams won their Super Bowl while in Saint Louis. They had one of the best offenses in the history of the NFL and I thought that they were going to crush the Tennessee Titans, but that didn't happen. Now, the Rams won, but it was a low scoring slug fest type of game with Mike Jones tackling Kevin Dyson at the one yard line to preserve the win for the Rams. It was their defense, not their historically great offense, that won that game for them. Then, when they played the New England Patriots, led by backup QB Tom Brady, the next year, it was a foregone conclusion that the Rams would win again. They had the much better team and much better players. Then, the game happened and the Patriots won on a last second field goal. People will look back at that game and say that the Patriots only won because of "spygate", but Bill Belichek outcoached Mike Martz and no matter how much "spygate" may have helped them, the Patriots played a much better game and Martz sorely underused his best offensive weapon, Marshall Faulk. That Super Bowl was a great example of one coach being prepared and the other coach being very under prepared. That 's why the Patriots won.

And thus, began the dominating run of the Patriots. Sure, teams like Pittsburgh and my Green Bay Packers and the Seahawks and the Colts have won Super Bowls in this time, but the one consistent team has been the Patriots. They have played in 11 of the last 15 AFC championship games and they've been to 6 Super Bowls, winning four of them. I already talked about them beating the Rams. They've also beaten the Eagles in a Super Bowl. That Eagles team had Donovan McNabb and Terrell Owens, but that wasn't enough to beat the Patriots. What I remember most about that Super Bowl was McNabb barfing in the huddle and Owens making great catches and then excuses for why it wasn't his, but everyone else's fault, that the Eagles got beat. I remember their Super Bowl win over the Carolina Panthers. The Patriots should have won that game going away, but Tom Brady threw one of the worst interceptions I've ever seen with a 14 point lead and the Panthers came all the way back to tie the game. Then, their kicker kicks the ball out of bounds, gives the Patriots excellent field position, and they win by a field goal once again. Then, their two losses to the Giants. One, they were undefeated and favored by 10 plus points. There was no way they were losing that game. But, the Giants constantly harassed Brady and they couldn't get their offense rolling. They still had a chance to win, but Eli Manning chucked the ball up in the air, after evading multiple sack attempts, and David Tyree made the best, and his last, catch I've ever seen. He pinned that ball to his helmet and the Giants went on to win by a field goal. Their second loss to the Giants also came down to one team dropping a pass, the Patriots and Wes Welker, and the other team making a miraculous catch, the Giants and Mario Manningham. That drop that Welker had was crushing. Had he caught that ball, the Patriots could have easily salted the clock away. But, that catch by Manningham, on a terrible throw from Eli Manning, was humongous and that kept the game winning drive alive. The Patriots played in last years Super Bowl, and they should have lost, until Pete Carroll and his offensive staff made the worst play call of all time. Why on earth they did not give that ball to Marshawn Lynch on the one yard line is still extremely baffling. But, Brady did pick apart the "legion of boom" and put his team in position to win, as he always does.

Now, I'm by no means a Patriots fan. I'm indifferent when it comes to them, but they have been the one team that has always been there at the end. Like I said, they've been in 11 AFC title games in 15 years, and they've won more tan half of them. This is why they're so prevalent in my recent Super Bowl memories, I will never forget the Packers win over the Steelers, but I can't help but notice how the Patriots are always in it until the very end. They're the most dominating team I've watched and that is why they are the team and they've played in the Super Bowls games that I remember most.

With all that being said, I hope we get a good, memorable game on Sunday so I can start making new memories about a new team, be it Carolina or Denver.

I think it will be Carolina.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man podcast. Do you love reading about his memories, well tomorrow you can hear him tell the stories on the X Millennial Man podcast. Read more from Ty by following him on twitter @tykulik.

In an era of bad sports announcers, Cris Collinsworth is the worst

Mic to be used for analysis, not opinion

My beloved Packers played the Seahawks on Sunday Night football last night, and as a fan I of course was tuned in.

It was a pretty good game. Green Bay outplayed the Seahawks for three quarters, with the Seahawks briefly taking the lead early in the third, but the Packers eventually won the game. I was happy with the outcome, it's always great when your team wins, but that's not the point of today's blog. Today I want to talk about my dislike for Cris Collinsworth.

He's a god awful football announcer. I have problems with a lot of different commentators, but Collinsworth is the worst. I watch a lot of college football, so I've grown to dislike guys like AJ McDonough and Chris Spielman. They always seem to do Michigan games, and I am always upset when I see them calling the game. Lee Corso, who a lot of people like, is unwatchable to me. He's a gimmick. He was a tremendous failure as a coach and, in my opinion, he's much worse as a TV personality. I couldn't care less about his "pick of the day" bull shit. Take pretty much anyone from ESPN for that matter. Mike Tirico and Jon Gruden couldn't be more annoying calling Monday night games. They act like two best friends that speak a language only the two of them understand. It's pretty unpleasant. With college basketball on ESPN you have morons like Digger Phelps and Dick Vitale. Digger Phelps is a poor mans Lee Corso, and I've been sick of the "Dickie V" character for a decade now. Jay Bilas is just as bad. Whenever anyone bad mouths Duke, his alma mater, he's quick to defend them. I'm sorry, but if you're going to be an analyst on TV, you can't have a favorite team. You're not doing your job fairly. Same thing can be said for Tony Kornheiser and Mike Wilbon. I watch "PTI" everyday, but the two of them are completely biased for players and teams they like. Wilbon won't say a bad thing about anyone from Chicago, or any team from Chicago. Take the recent Patrick Kane story. He plays for the Blackhawks, and was accused of sexual assault this offseason. Wilbon hasn't said one bad thing about him because, as he put it, "we don't know all of the story yet". That's horse shit. If he played for any other team in hockey you'd say he needs to be suspended, if not kicked out of the league. Kornheiser is just as bad with East Coast teams. Anyone from New York gets a pass, except for the Knicks, and he is a huge fan of all the professional teams in Washington. Forget the fact that the NFL team from Washington is terrible and the Wizards, Capitals and Nationals never live up to expectations, he still defends them to the high heavens and jumps all over teams that aren't on the East Coast for being chokers. It's such a joke.

But, with all these terrible, biased announcers and TV personalities I've mentioned, Cris Collinsworth takes the trophy for most insufferable. He is so in the bag for the Seahawks, it's hard to listen to him call a game. I'll get to last night in a minute, but let's look at last season. He and Al Michaels, I like Al Michaels and feel bad for him that Collinsworth is John Madden's replacement, called the first game of the 2014 season. It was also Green Bay and Seattle. Seattle was coming off a big Super Bowl win over Denver and you would have thought that Collinsworth was part of the team. Everything he said was praise for the Seahawks. They were the greatest defense ever, even better than the 85 Bears he said. Marshawn Lynch was the second coming of Jim Brown in his opinion. Russell Wilson was the second coming of John Elway. It was made worse by the fact that Seattle beat Green Bay pretty handily in that game last year. Collinsworth couldn't have sounded happier. Everything was praise for how great of a team the Seahawks were last season. And, that was the case since they made it to the Super Bowl, which he called with Al Michaels. Collinsworth sounded on edge the whole game. You could clearly tell that he was pulling for and wanted the Seahawks to win this game badly. Every time the Patriots scored, Collinsworth would make a claim that Seattle blew a coverage, or that New England got away with a penalty. It was never that New England was outplaying them for most of the night, it was something Seattle or the refs did wrong. He never pointed out the fact that Tom Brady picked apart Seattle's secondary. The Patriots dinked and dunked their way up and down the field all game, but you'd never know that if you listened to Collinsworth. No praise for New England during the game. Seattle had a chance to win that game as we all now know. As they drove down the field, with one of the luckiest catches I've ever seen, Collinsworth sounded almost giddy calling this drive. Then the infamous one yard line pass happened. You guys remember the face that Richard Sherman made when Malcolm Butler intercepted Russell Wilson (behold beauty)? I bet that Collinsworth wasn't just making that same face, I bet he was crying. He sounded audibly upset that the Seahawks lost that game. You can't pick sides when calling games as an announcer, especially in the Super Bowl. It's fine to have a favorite team, we all do, but when you do TV, you CANNOT be biased. It's unfair to all the watchers.

Last night was probably the worst I've ever heard from Collinsworth. Once again, whenever Green Bay did something good, or drove down the field, or stopped Seattle's drives, it was never because the Packers did something right, it was Seattle doing something wrong. When Seattle took the lead in the third, he sounded like a proud father, heaping praise on Wilson's performance. Wilson played well in the game last night, but he threw a crucial interception on a screen pass. A linebacker dropped into coverage and picked him off one handed. The linebacker fumbled at the end of the play, Green Bay clearly recovered the ball, but that's not what happened in Collinsworth's perspective. First, he claimed the running back that the screen was set up for, didn't show himself quick enough to Wilson. Then, the line left their blocks too quick. Then, what a lucky interception he kept saying. Finally, he was convinced that the Seahawks recovered the fumble. He insisted, even after the game, that the refs blew that call and cost them the game. Never mind the fact that right after the turnover Aaron Rodgers, and more importantly, James Starks drove the Packers right down the field for the go ahead touchdown and two point conversion. The Packers would later add a field goal to make it a ten point lead and they stripped Fred Jackson with thirty seconds left to seal the game. But, after it was all said and done, you would have thought that the Seahawks got screwed over by the refs if you listened to Collinsworth. He's the worst kind of announcer. Not only does he have a team he roots for, but he openly roots for them while calling their games on national TV. That is unacceptable. He needs to stop with the Seahawk love and do his job correctly. I long for the days of Keith Jackson and John Madden calling games, but, unfortunately, we seem to be moving into an era of commentators openly rooting for teams while they call games. Collinsworth has started it, and it's only going to get worse from here.

That's a bummer.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing. He does not have any strong religious beliefs, yet he does think God wanted the Packers to win because that is what matters in the world. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.

Let Me Respectfully Explain Why Your Team Stinks: Ty's new hatred for the Seattle Seahawks

It is insulting when you call me a Seahawk

There are some teams I really, really dislike.

Today, I'm going to go back to my irrational hatred for a football team. In two previous blogs, I've written about my irrational hatred for University of Missouri college football and the Los Angeles Clippers from the NBA. Today, I turn my attention to the NFL with the Seattle Seahawks. Good timing to, since the season started last night and truly gets underway on Sunday. The Seahawks are the first team I'll be writing about, under my irrational hatred blogs, that have won a championship. They won the Super Bowl two years ago, and played in the Super Bowl last year. They should've won that game, but I'll get to that later. Missouri football hasn't won anything of importance in over 50 years, and the Clippers have never won anything important ever in their history.

So, let's get to what I hate about the Seahawks. First, there was a time, about 10 years ago, when I actually rooted for the Seahawks in the Super Bowl. They played the Steelers, a team that will be talked about in this discussion at another time. That version of the Seahawks were coached by former Packer coach Mike Holmgren and had Shaun Alexander. I actually, kind of, liked this team. Shaun Alexander was my number one pick in my fantasy draft that year. I also liked the fact that they were a quiet team. No trash talk, no media stuff, they just went out and played football.  By the way, the Seahawks won that Super Bowl. The history books have the Steelers as the champs, but the refs screwed the Seahawks and the NFL and ESPN needed a redemption story for rapist Ben Roethlisberger.

Right after that season, I kind of forgot about the Seahawks. They were mediocre for the next 5 to 7 seasons. Then, they won, what was at the time, the worst division in football, the NFC West with a 7-9 record. This was three or four seasons ago. That was Pete Carroll's first season as head coach. Not only did they win that god awful division, but they went out and beat the New Orleans Saints in the Wild Card game. In typical Saints fashion, they had to go on the road to Seattle, Seattle won the division so they got home field, and the Saints couldn't stop the run. Go back and watch all the missed tackles on what is probably Marshawn Lynch's most famous run.  

It is after this Wild Card win and their subsequent draft  where my hatred for the Seahawks began. They started to pump their chests and say how great they were. Excuse the shit out of me, but you assholes backed your way into the playoffs that season and beat the Saints when everyone expected you to. This attitude is indicative of their head coach. Pete Carroll is a douchebag. This is the same guy who called out Mark Sanchez in front of the media when he declared for the draft. Sanchez was his quarterback at USC, they just came off a Rose Bowl win and he didn't have another decent QB on the roster. So, instead of doing what college coaches are supposed to do, support their players decisions and dreams, he acted like a dumped girlfriend. What makes this even worse, Carroll left USC within a year after Sanchez left for the NFL. Why did he care so much? I'll tell you why, he's a prick that whines like a baby when he doesn't get his way. Let's not forget how much of a cheater at USC he was. He bought Reggie Bush's family a home and a car. He had so many recruiting violations against him that, had he stayed at USC, they could've gotten the death penalty. So, he bolted for the NFL, and you'd think his cheating would stop, but nope. The Seahawks are one of the most suspicious teams in the NFL. Be it fighting between teammates in the locker room or steroids or even players using Ritalin. All these things, with the exception of the fighting, is against the rules. Does the NFL or Pete Carroll or Roger Goodell do anything about it? No, they're all too busy attacking the Patriots for under inflated footballs and stuff that happened almost a decade ago. Pete Carroll also made the worst play call ever during last year's Super Bowl. How do you not hand the ball off to Lynch on the goal line?! That call proves your ignorance and arrogance. I was elated you lost the Super Bowl in crushing fashion. You're an idiot Pete Carroll and  I hate you.

I mentioned the draft also as a reason why I hate this team. They undercut other teams and under pay their rookies. They seem to get pretty good players at a super cheap salary. How on Earth does that happen. Guys like Michael Bennett, Doug Baldwin and the majority of their offensive line are really underpaid. Marshawn Lynch is the best running back in the league right now, and they just gave him a multi million dollar extension last year. Their best secondary player, Kam Chancellor is willing to sit the whole season because, for football players, he's criminally underpaid. Richard Sherman is due for a huge raise, but will he get it? Probably not because they just gave Russell Wilson a HUGE contract.

This brings me to another big, big problem I have with the Seahawks, Russell Wilson. This guy is the most corporate, robotic piece of human trash I could ever imagine. He shows no emotions, unless he's talking about God. Let's get things straight too, he's a mediocre QB at best. This team didn't make it to two consecutive Super Bowls because of Russell Wilson, their defense and Marshawn Lynch carried them. But, you turn on ESPN or the NFL Network, and he's mentioned in the same breath as Aaron Rodgers, Peyton Manning, Tom Brady and old timers like Warren Moon and Fran Tarkenton. I'd take all those QB's over Wilson in a second. He's got little to no touch on his throws and he's going to get killed running the read option. He's a tick better than Colin Kaepernick, and that's not a compliment. The fact that the Seahawks gave him Aaron Rodgers money is going to cripple this team in the long run. Instead of paying the players that got them to the highest point in football, they paid a sub par QB a shit ton of money.

All his God talk needs to stop. When he first got in the league, players from other teams, it's been reported, said that he slept with their girlfriends while they were still together. That's not good in God's eye Russell Wilson. Also, if there is a God, he doesn't give a shit about you. You are the least of his problems. He's also totally sleeping with current girlfriend, musician Ciara. Nobody buys your guys bull shit. Russell Wilson is also known for clashing with teammates. He ran Golden Tate and Percy Harvin out of town. He tried to get the front office to trade Lynch in the middle of last season. Screw you Russell Wilson, have fun winning 6 or 7 games for the rest of your career. And, nobody outside of Seattle likes Marshawn Lynch or Richard Sherman. The hatred for Lynch isn't as bad for Sherman, Lynch pokes fun at himself, but his whole attitude towards media and people outside of his circle is stupid. Quit trying to be the Rasheed Wallace of the NFL. You're not as charasmatic as Rasheed Wallace. Richard Sherman on the other hand, boy the hatred is strong. Sherman is the best cover corner in the league, but he needs to stop talking. You went out and got into a fight with Skip Bayless. I can't think of a more douchey fight. You're a Stanford grad Richard Sherman, you don't have to constantly go on TV and tell us how smart you are. We know you're smart. You're also a bad sport. You lose with no dignity, and when you win, I close my ears because I can't deal with your mouth. You're like a conservative republican. You think you're correct because you're the loudest. Just shut the hell up and go out there and play football. You're a good enough football player that you don't need to run your mouth. Also, nothing made me happier than when Russell Wilson threw that pick and your smile turned to a frown. It was euphoric for me to watch you lose.

Seahawks fans are pretty ridiculous too. As I said earlier, you guys just recently became good. Before this success, I didn't know one single Seahawk fan. Now, they're coming out of the woodwork. If that's not a bandwagon fan, I don't know what is. You guys are the 21st century Dallas Cowboys. By this I mean, your fans are bandwagon fans and people that don't like you, HATE you and your fans. I hate all these actors and comedians, that I enjoy, are pounding the drum for you all over social media. Comedian Nick Thune, who I think is great, acts like there's no other team in the NFL. Or, when he does talk about a team not called the Seahawks, that team is a cheater and all their fans suck. Come back to me when the Seahawks are also rans in two years and tell me that you're still a fan. Chris Pratt, the biggest star right now and one of my favorite actors, is all over social media with his Seahawk love. Where were you five years ago?! I didn't hear or see you pumping up the Seahawks. You were like a ghost, but now that they're good, you're all over the place talking about Seahawk love. I bet the two of you couldn't name the starting QB the year before Matt Hasselbeck took over the job. You guys probably loved Hasselbeck when he was your QB, but now, you probably tell other people that he's a joke and shouldn't be in the league. I've got news for you guys, your QB's have never been elite.

So, these and many, many other reasons are why I loathe the Seahawks. It's a new hatred, but it's very strong and will only get stronger. Screw you Seattle Seahawks and screw your "12th" man bull shit. No one cares.  

You will be irrelevant in two years.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and co-host of the X Millennial Man podcast. His love for Michigan Football is much greater than all of his hatred combined (please Jim Harbaugh, start winning soon). Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.

Ty's NFL Preview 2015: NFC

Game is on, get ready to...why is Ty's drink still green?

The NFC is also made up of four divisions as well, the East, West, North and South. The NFC East is made up of the, Dallas Cowboys, Philadelphia Eagles, the team from the region of Washington DC and the New York Giants. The Cowboys completely shocked me last season. I didn't see them playing that well at all, especially on defense. DeMarco Murray was awesome, but he's gone to the Eagles and Dez Bryant is good, but he's got Tony Romo throwing him the ball. That's a bummer. Jason Witten is reliable, but old. The defense will take a step back for sure. The offensive line is good, but as I mentioned before, DeMarco Murray is gone and Darren McFadden won't ease the loss. The Cowboys are going to take a big step back this season and probably only win 9 games. That may be enough to win this division. The Eagles have had a very odd offseason. Chip Kelly traded away a lot of great players like, LeSean McCoy and Jeremy Maclin and Nick Foles. The only one he really "replaced" was McCoy by signing Murray. Sam Bradford seems to be their starting QB, but he CANNOT stay healthy (I am from St. Louis, I know this). He's a liability. They also brought in Tim Freakin Tebow. That guy is not an NFL quarterback, he's just not good. The Eagles defense is pretty good and should keep them in games. They will either win 11 or 5 games, who knows. I will split the difference and say they get to 10 wins, but barely. The New York Giants aren't a very good football team, and the recent news that Eli Manning wants to be the highest paid player in football is laughable. Sure, he's won two super bowls, but what have you done for me lately besides lead the league in interceptions and stupid faces. They have no running game. They do have Odell Beckham JR and Victor Ortiz, but that doesn't matter when Eli is throwing it to the other team. Their defense is not good either. They will be lucky to get to 7 wins this year. Until they are willing to change their name, the team from Washington will get no love from me. They stink anyway and 4 wins would be a shocker. The Eagles will win this division and get the pleasure of being blown out by whoever they play in the first round of the playoffs.

The NFC West is one of the best, if not the best, divisions in the NFL. First, you have the Seattle Seahawks. They have the best defense in the league and it's not even close. All three phases are lights out, and while I may not like the players in the secondary, they are shut down corners and the safeties are heavy hitters. The offense is run by the overrated Russel Wilson. That offense is truly run by Marshawn Lynch. He's the current best running back in the league. He's truly a beast. They don't have great receivers, but they traded for Jimmy Graham this offseason and that will only make them better. They will easily get to 11 wins this year. The St.Louis Rams are up and coming, but I don't know how they'll play with expectations. They also have a great defense and one of the best defensive lines in the league. They drafted a great running back in Todd Gurley and replaced the oft injured Sam Bradford with Nick Foles. He's an upgrade at QB. The receivers are small, but explosive. If they can put it all together, they won't be able to challenge the Seahawks yet, but they could win 9 or 10 games. The Arizona Cardinals are another good team in this division. If Carson Palmer can stay healthy, they should be good on offense with him throwing to Michael Floyd and Larry Fitzgerald. The running game was in flux, but they just signed Chris Johnson to a one year deal. If he can do half as good as when he was with the Titans, they should be set. Their defense is awesome led by cornerback Patrick Peterson. They are really good, but they seem to get bitten by the injury bug every season. They should win 10 games, barring any big injury, but someone will inevitably get hurt, so they'll probably only get 8 or 9 wins. The San Francisco 49ers round out the division. This team seems to have gone into rebuild mode. They changed coaches, lost Frank Gore, Patrick Willis retired along with a lot of players on defense and Michael Crabtree left in free agency. They still have Anquan Boldin and Colin Kaepernick, but this team is going to take a huge step back. They will only get 5 or 6 wins this year. This division will be won by the Seahawks again, but it will be very tough.

The NFC South is the exact opposite of the West. This division could be won by a team with 8 or fewer wins. The teams are, the New Orleans Saints, the Atlanta Falcons, the Carolina Panthers and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. The Saints still have Drew Brees, but he's old and they got rid of his best weapons. Their defense is terrible as well. 6 or 7 wins would be ideal for them. The Falcons have Matt Ryan,  Roddy White and Julio Jones, but they have no running game and they don't even try to run the ball and this is a team with another pretty bad defense. If Matt Ryan plays well and gets the ball to either White or Jones, they could outscore teams on their way to 8 wins, but 6 wins seems more likely. The Panthers do have Cam Newton and while he's inaccurate, he has a big arm and he's hard to tackle when he's in the open field. They have a so so running game led by DeAngelo Williams and they have upgraded at receiver with Kelvin Benjamin and rookie Devin Funchess. They do have a decent defense led by linebacker Luke Kuechly. They could win 9 games this year. The Buccaneers are still in rebuild mode and will be led by rookie QB Jameis Winston. Rookie QB's struggle and while he does have Vincent Jackson and the big receiver from Texas A&M, they have no run game and a god awful defense. 3 or 4 wins is the bar for the Bucs. The Panthers will win this division with only 9 wins this year.

The final NFC division, the NFC North should and will be won by the Green Bay Packers. The defense improved last season and will take another step in the right direction this season. They have the best QB in the league in Aaron Rodgers and he has weapons on offense like Jordy Nelson and Randall Cobb. They also have a good running game led by Eddie Lacy. The Packers should win 12 games and the division easily. The Minnesota Vikings will be better. They get child abuser Adrian Peterson back and, while he hits little children, he's a good running back. But, he's a terrible person. Teddy Bridgewater looks like he's going to be good and if he can get some help from receivers the offense could look good. The defense is decent, but nothing to write home about. They could get to 9 wins this season. The Detroit Lions will continue to baffle me. Matthew Stafford is so inconsistent, but when you have a receiver like Calvin Johnson, he'll make you look good. They got a great running back in the draft in Ameer Abdullah. He'll immediately be better for them than Reggie Bush was. The defense lost Suh and Nick Fairley, so they'll take a step back. 8 or 9 wins seems like their destiny. The Chicago Bears round out the division and they're a total mess. They did hire John Fox, but he won't be able to fix the mess that is the Bears in one season. They have no defense, no receivers, a shitty QB in Jay Cutler and poor Matt Forte can only do so much. The Bears are like a worse version of the Chiefs. At least the Chiefs are competitive. The Bears will be lucky to get 5 wins this year.

So, the NFC playoff teams will be the Seahawks, the Packers, the Panthers and the Eagles, the four division winners. The two wild card teams will be, I'm going to go out on a big limb here, and pick the Rams and the Vikings. I even see the Vikings beating the Eagles in the first round and the Rams fighting, but losing late to the Panthers in the playoffs. The Vikings will see their season end at the hands of the Seahawks and the Panthers will get mercy killed by the Packers. This sets up a rematch of the NFC title game from last year, and the Packers will avenge their loss with a big win and advance to face the Colts in Super Bowl 50. 

Coming up next, Super Bowl and awards.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and co-host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. The editor appreciates his hopes for the Vikings. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.