Let Me Respectfully Explain Why Macklemore Sucks

The only good place to store Macklemore's "music"

Today I'm going to go back in time and do one of my favorite things, explain why I irrationally hate something. I usually save this for sports teams, but today, my sole focus for my hatred will be squarely on a "rapper". Many of you may have just read that sentence and assumed that I will be talking about Drake today, but not so fast. I'll save him for another day. I have also shit on him a lot on the podcast.

But, today I was driving in my car listening to my Pandora stations on shuffle, and something so damning to my ears came on that I got literally upset. I yelled at Pandora as if the AI could hear me for what they'd done to me. I felt like tossing my phone out of the car because of how angry I was that Pandora's AI thought I would want to hear anything from the "rapper" Macklemore. 

I DESPISE Macklemore. I think he is one of, if not the, most overrated "emcees" of all time. And yes, I'm going to continue to use quotes throughout this whole article because he is one fake ass "rapper".

Macklemore first jumped on my radar in 2013 with the horrendous song, "Thrift Shop". Everyone I knew loved this song, but me. I could not stand it. I did not like the hook. I thought that the beat was terrible, at best. I loathed the video for this song. But, what irked me most was this phony new "rapper" Macklemore trying to rap. It was disgusting. He sounds like a white guy trying to rap. That is not a compliment. You know when you hear someone like Eminem, El-P or Mike Skinner(AKA The Streets), and they sound like a legit rapper? That is the opposite feeling I got when I heard Macklemore. He was trying so hard to be a "rapper", where with real rappers, it just comes naturally. Of course "Thrift Shop" blew up. It was everywhere. Try as I might, I could not get away from the song. Every party, gathering, radio station or place I went or listened to, that damn song was on. It never grew on me at all. It had the opposite effect. The more I heard it the more I hated it.

People then looked for what he was going to do next, and to everyone else around him I give credit, his next single was "Same Love". This song has a great message, just a terrible messenger. If this had just been the lady singing who sang the hook, I would have been totally on board with this track. As I have said, I love and respect and agree with the message behind "Same Love", but, every time I hear Macklemore's dumbass "rap", I get angry.

A great spoof of how horrific a messenger Macklemore is was Andy Samberg as Connor 4 Real in "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping" when he sang the song "Equal Rights". It is almost indistinguishable as to which guy is singing which song, and Andy Samberg was making a joke. That should, in and of itself, be enough evidence that Macklemore is an absolute joke.

Of course his record "The Heist" went on to win multiple Grammys, including beating out Kendrick Lamar's "Good Kid, M.A.D.D. City" for best rap record. That is one of the biggest "upsets" in the history of the stupid Grammys. In my opinion, that ranks right up there with Jethro Tull beating out Metallica for Best Heavy Metal Album, which many people see as the biggest upset in Grammys history. To make himself look even worse though, Macklemore supposedly texted an apology to Kendrick Lamar, telling him he deserved the award. What a douchebag. Just take your prize and let it be. I'm positive Kendrick Lamar doesn't give a second thought to the Grammys because he is way too busy making relevant, meaningful, incredible music. Only a moron like Macklemore would think that Kendrick Lamar would want an apology text from him. This was so stupid.

Then, Macklemore went on to show up in a multitude of Dr. Pepper commercials, claiming he was an independent artist who did things on his own terms. He would then take a sip of a Dr. Pepper at the end of these commercials claiming to be an "independent artist". This is such a sell out move. Just admit you did it for the money. Every musician and band does this now. It doesn't make you a sell out, unless you come across like Macklemore did in these stupid Dr. Pepper commercials. Some of my favorite bands, like the Black Keys for one main example, sell their songs to commercials all the time. I don't care because they don't come out and try and explain why they sold their music. I know why, they're getting paid a shit ton of money to do it. I'd do the same thing. Macklemore's Dr. Pepper commercials reminded me of myself when I was 17 and claimed anyone I liked that performed on TV or had one of their songs in a big time commercial was a sell out. Let me repeat my age, I was 17. Macklemore acts like a 17 year old. He also went on to do more stupid commercials, I don't even know what for, but he and Russell Wilson were hanging out. They said it was the Seattle connection, but I just saw a couple of holier than thou douchebags shilling some nonsense, and I hated those commercials too.

Many people anticipated Macklemore's second record, I couldn't have cared less, and it was a total flop. Again, I go to the "Popstar" comparison. Just like "Connquest" was a colossal failure for Conner 4 Real, so was "The Unruly Mess I've Made" for Macklemore. It was a colossal critical and monetary failure. That album got incredibly panned by critics and fans alike. I assumed the unruly mess he was talking about was his terrible "rapping", but I'm sure he was talking about some other bull shit that he thought made him seem semi important.

I hope this is the end of his "rap" career because he is garbage. I also do not know one single person, nor has anyone come to me and said, I'm a Macklemore fan. I know he sold millions of records, but I do not know one single person that owns a Macklemore single or record. It is a lot like The Black Eyed Peas with Fergie. I know they sold records, but I don't know one single person that claims to be a fan. Macklemore is trash and he should quit music forever. I hope it happens sooner rather than later.  

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. He was at the thrift shop yesterday and saw all of Macklemore's music for $.99. Follow Ty on instagram and twitter.

SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.

The SeedSing 2016 Year in Pop Culture: Best, and Worst, in Movies

Day 2 of my "Best Of" lists will be my top 5 movies from 2016, and I'll throw in one bad one for good measure. But, I need to address the death of Carrie Fisher very quickly. SCREW YOU 2016. YOU ARE THE WORST. THIS IS A TRAGIC, TRAGIC YEAR AND IT NEEDS TO END NOW. 2016 HAS STUNK.

Okay, let's get back to the countdown.

My number 5 movie of 2016 is "Midnight Special". This movie totally flew under the radar. I heard, nor saw, next to nothing about this movie until it was available for renting from Netflix, and it came up as recommended for me. I saw no trailers, no reviews, nothing. But, I thought the story sounded pretty cool, l liked the cast, which included Michael Shannon, Joel Edgerton, Kirsten Dunst, Adam Driver and Jaeden Lieberher and I saw that Patton Oswalt was talking about it on Twitter, so I rented it. Man am I glad that I did. This movie was super interesting and very unique. It was an indie take on superhero movies, but it was so much more. It touched on moral and ethical issues. There was talk of family and friendship being so important. The story between the dad and the son, who had the super powers, was tremendous. The chase scenes, and any other scene that featured the kid's powers for that matter, were quiet, but incredible. I loved this movie so much, and I find myself thinking about it a lot still, and I watched it a few months ago. I highly recommend people seeing this movie, even if you are not a superhero fan. The movie is more about a father-son relationship than any superhero stuff. "Midnight Special" deserved to be talked about more, and I think it is one of the best 5 movies of the year.

At number 4, I have "Deadpool". This movie got the opposite attention than a movie like "Midnight Special", but that was not only a good thing, it was an incredible thing. All the previews and mini videos that Ryan Reynolds did as Deadpool were so incredibly awesome, funny and very much needed for this movie. Reynolds worked so hard to get this movie made, and I love the fact that he was out there beating the drum so loudly gearing up to its release. Then, the movie came out, and it was an absolute home run. Everything about this movie was new and different. Deadpool breaking the fourth wall and talking directly to the audience the whole time was innovative and hilarious. The way the story was told was much like "Citizen Kane", in the way the story jumped time between past and present. The movie was wildly violent, but that is exactly what I wanted out of a movie that boasted that it was not a superhero movie, but a violent comedy. The opening scene was one of the best things I have seen in movies in quite some time. Starting out as Deadpool, but going back and forth, while wasting bad guys, between his present and his past was awesome. This was the perfect role for Reynolds as well. Any time he can quip, that is what he does best, it usually works well for him, even if the movie isn't that good. Fortunately for Reynolds though, "Deadpool" is awesome. This is one of the best "superhero" movies, but do not watch it with any child under the age of 17. This movie is violent and vulgar to a very high degree. I love "Deadpool".

My number 3 movie of 2016 is "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping". This is another pop culture thing, much like "Atlanta", that I have been beating the drum for since I heard about it. "Popstar" was the newest movie from the Lonely Island, and it was the perfect skewering of the ups and downs of celebrity life in the pop music business. This was probably the funniest movie that I saw all year. Andy Samberg was wonderful in the starring role, Conner 4 Real. He did such a great impression of a dirty version of Justin Bieber/Macklemore. Every step and bit of this movie was perfect. The idea of how selling out has become the norm, great. The fact that you have to be so in touch with your fans in this day and age, but how they can turn on you on a dime if you have one misstep, exceptional. Seeing the downfall of a "one hit wonder" was done so well. Seeing that person trying to make a come back and failing at this task, again, perfect. "Popstar" was everything I wanted it to be, and so much more. Samberg was great, as I said, but so were Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaefer, Chris Redd, Sarah Silverman and Tim Meadows. Meadows was exceptional in fact. He was the second best person in this movie. The unfortunate thing for "Popstar", no one went to see it in the theaters, and that is a shame. This movie is underrated, did not get the credit it deserved, but it will become a "cult classic". I guarantee this.

At number 2, and some may say this is cheap, but I don't care, I have "O.J.: Made in America". People may say it is cheap because it was a 5 part documentary series on ESPN, but for all intents and purposes, this was a 7 plus hour documentary, that was released in a few theaters in its entirety, so I count it as a movie. This is the best, hands down, documentary that I have ever seen. This told a tragic story of a tragic person so, so well. This was a perfectly made movie. We got every bit of detail we could have ever wanted out of the tragic tale that is O.J Simpson's life. From his high school to college to pro to after NFL to acting to everything after that, it was all covered in great detail. I do not know how anyone can watch this movie and not think that he was, at the very least, somehow involved in the horrific death of 2 people. Things got even worse for him after the famous trial, but things were bad for him all the way back to his college days. O.J. was/is a troubled person, and this movie shows us that tenfold. "O.J.: Made in America" is a true classic, and everyone should take the time to watch. It is dark, tragic and great.

My number 1 movie of 2016 is, "Hunt For the Wilderpeople". This movie was phenomenal. Everything about "HFTWP" was done perfectly. The actors, mainly Sam Neill and Julian Dennison, did a tremendous job. Taika Waititi did an awesome job of directing this gem. The writers were awesome. The setting and the shots were beautiful. "HFTWP" was just downright perfect. The story is about a young juvenile delinquent that goes to live with his aunt and uncle, but so much more happens. There's adventure, comedy, thrills, drama, sadness and a great chase scene near the end. This was another movie that did not get its just due until much later in its run in the theaters. This was such a well done, funny and moving movie. I truly believe that both Dennison and Neill deserve Oscar nominations for acting, and Waititi deserves one for directing. I have seen this movie already about a dozen times, and it never gets old. "Hunt For the Wilderpeople" was the cream of the crop when it comes to movies in 2016. This was one of the good things to come from this not so good year. Go see it now, I know you will love it as much as I did.

Now, for my one bad movie, it has to be "Batman V Superman". This movie was dreadful. Ben Affleck was terrible as Batman/Bruce Wayne. The guy who plays Superman, I do not even remember his name, was so god damn boring and terrible as Superman/Clark Kent. Amy Adams was whiny and way too involved in this movie as Lois Lane. Doomsday was too dark and hard to see, and way too CGI for my taste. Gal Gadot was the only good thing about this movie, as Wonder Woman, but she was hardly in this piece of garbage. "Batman V Superman" was so awful. I fast forwarded through most of it, to get to the fight scenes, but even those were terrible. Batman had some of the dumbest lines ever spoken in a movie, and Superman would destroy him in a real fight with one punch, but this guy playing Superman needed to brood a bit too much before he could even fight Batman. Also, screw the ending of this movie. So god damn lazy. Zack Snyder is making terrible movies that should be easy to make, or at the very least, they should be watchable, which "Batman V Superman" was not. This movie was absolute garbage.

That does it for today. Come back tomorrow for my top 5 albums of 2016.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man podcast. He thought Batman V Superman was about a famous Supreme Court case involving Sigmund Freud and the New Hampshire Parks Department Head of bat sanctuaries. He wishes that he was right. Follow Ty on instagram and twitter.

SeedSing is funded by a group of awesome people. Join them by donating to SeedSing.

Cloves and Fedoras: Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping is the Movie of the Summer

Over this past weekend I finally got to see my most anticipated movie of the summer, "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping", and boy, did it ever deliver.

"Popstar" might be one of the funniest movies that I have ever seen. I'm a humongous fan of everything the Lonely Island does. The Lonely Island is Akiva Schafer, Jorma Taccone and Andy Samberg. They started doing the short videos on "SNL" a long time ago, and those were always fun and very funny. They have released four albums as a "rap" group, and while it is meant to be comedic, some of their songs are really good, chart topping good. Then, awhile back they created one of my all time favorite movies, "Hot Rod". "Hot Rod" was so bizarre and not like any comedy I had ever seen. The jokes were written and delivered weird, but in a very funny way. I absolutely adore that movie. It has gone down as one of my personal top ten movies of all time.

While doing all these things, the Lonely Island worked with a "minimal" sum of money, compared to what some other comedic teams were working with. Well, with "Popstar", they had a pretty big industry backing and many famous people came on as producers. Basically, they got the money to make a very big, very funny movie and they 100 percent did that with "Popstar". The movie focuses on Andy Samberg's character Connor 4Real. He, Jorma and Akiva were once in a band called the Styleboyz, but they broke up and Conner(Andy Samberg) blew up as a solo artist. He kept Owen(Jorma Taccone), as his DJ, but Lawrence(Akiva Schafer), looked at Conner as a sell out and left the music business to become a farmer in Colorado. I don't want to spoil anything because people need to see this movie, but that is the basics of the story.

"Popstar" is about so much more than a singer becoming famous and trying to live up to expectations. If I had to pick one central theme to the movie, I'd say it is about excess and how watered down the pop music industry has become in the 21st century. For example, Conner has 32 people on his payroll. These 32 people have jobs like someone to hit Conner in the balls when he forgets where he came from, or a perspective model, to make Conner look taller at photo shoots. It sounds insane and hilarious, of which it is both, but it is also a little too real. I would bet a lot of money that some famous pop stars today have similar type people on their personal payroll. Conner also has a house that would be too big if 50 people lived in it. Once again, we all see what kind of homes these singers today own. They are gaudy, huge and no one should ever want, or need a house that big. Conner also surrounds himself with only yes men and women. No matter how dumb, hurtful or ridiculous his ideas become, all his people tell him what a great idea it is, even if that means they eat pancakes that have dog shit in them. We all know that people like the Beibs, or Taylor Swift have a whole crew of people surrounding them that only say good things about them.

Once we leave the excess, "Popstar" moves into the decline that all these pop singers will eventually face. Conner's second solo album is an absolute flop, and it is because of Conner, and he does not know how to deal with the bad reviews and his fans turning on him. He will do almost anything to get back in his fans good graces. He wants to release his music in kitchen appliances so the whole world can hear his new record. Doesn't that sound eerily similar to U2 giving away their record for free on iTunes? I didn't want that album, but it showed up on my music the day it was released. I couldn't delete it fast enough. Same thing happens to Conner. People opening their refrigerators, ovens and microwaves were inundated with his music and they proceeded to break their home appliances. Conner can't sell out any of his shows, so he brings on the hot new rap artist, Hunter the Hungry, played so great by Chris Redd, but when he starts to get more shine than Conner, Conner becomes annoyed, jealous and upset. He can't handle not being the center of attention.

There are so many other ways this movie shows the excess and the almost obsessive need to be loved in so many great ways. Jorma is great as the DJ that is just along for the ride, but growing tired of not being involved. Akiva Schafer is phenomenal as the guy that leaves the music business, but just wants credit where credit is due. Tim Meadows is tremendous as Conner's manager and former member of Tony! Tone! Toni! Tony?. Imogen Poots is so perfect as Ashley Wednesday, Conner's star chaser girlfriend that leaves him the moment he isn't as famous as he once was. Sarah Silverman is very funny and very good as Conner's head of PR. There are so many other great performances in "Popstar". But, Samberg shines in this role. He is so good at playing this type of character and I want to see so much more stuff like this from the Lonely Island.

The fact that this movie isn't doing so well at the box office is an absolute shame. People nowadays would rather watch some mind numbing Michael Bay crappy action movie. That stinks. That isn't new or hip or even good. It's all rehashed garbage that didn't work in the 80's and 90's. It's a real bummer that more people would rather watch trash than a smart, well written, well acted and well directed comedy like "Popstar". This movie was incredible and greatly exceeded even my very high expectations. I cannot wait to see it again, buy it when it comes out on Blu-Ray and watch it over and over and over again. "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping" is a triumph.

GO SUPPORT THIS MOVIE!

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture Editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. He is serious people, go see this movie. Right now. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.

The Movie of 2016 Will be "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping"

The Popcorn is buttered. Now we wait

I know that there are some big movies coming out this summer. First of all, this week we have "Batman VS Superman: Dawn of Justice", which I'm not excited about at all. Go back and listen to the podcast from last week for my thoughts and complaints about it. Some big time superhero/action movies I am looking forward to come out this summer as well. Movies like "X-Men: Apocalypse" or "Captain America: Civil War". There's even some comedies that I am pumped for like "Ghostbusters" and "Keanu". But, I saw a trailer for a movie last week and it immediately stomped my excitement for any of those movies.

This movie is the one that I am most looking forward to seeing, and that's just based on a 2 minute trailer. The movie is the new Lonely Island movie, "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping" (trailer NSFW). I am so very excited to see this movie. I love all the superhero, action and other comedies I mentioned, but none of them come remotely close to my excitement for "Popstar". The first trailer was released last week, as I said before, and it is riotous.

Andy Samberg plays the main character that is a Justin Bieber clone that calls himself Conner4Real. First things first, I love me some Andy Samberg. He was one of my favorite all time cast members while on "SNL". I absolutely adore the movie "Hot Rod", which I will touch on later. He was excellent in smaller roles in movies like "I Love You Man" and "The To Do List". He was awesome in the HBO tennis movie "7 Days in Hell", which I wrote about a long time ago. And he's so great on "Brooklyn 99". He has made so much stuff that I enjoy, even when he shows up in a crappy movie like "Grown Ups 2", I find his one scene the best scene in a terrible movie. Needless to say, I'm a huge Andy Samberg fan.

The other two members of the Lonely Island, Jorma Taccone and Akiva Schaffer, I am also a big fan of. The three of them make some hilarious parody hip hop as the Lonely Island, I own all three of their records. Go listen to songs like "I'm On a Boat", "Like A Boss", "Turtleneck and Chain", basically any music they put out. It's not only funny, but it is some damn good hip hop music. It's a parody, but it is good. The three of them are like a goofier version of the Beastie Boys, just not as talented as the Beastie Boys. But, I really like all the other stuff that Taccone and Schaffer have had their hands on. I enjoyed all the stuff they wrote and directed while a part of the writing and directing team over at "SNL". Go back and check out YouTube videos of Taccone dancing during bands rehearsals that were going to be on "SNL" that week. It's pretty hilarious. Taccone is also great in the smaller roles he takes on. He was excellent as Cupid on an episode of "Man Seeking Woman". He was great on his three episodes of "Parks and Rec" as the CEO of the internet company that takes over Pawnee in the future. He's funny and weird as Spazz on "The League". Basically, he falls in the same territory as Samberg for me. I like pretty much everything he is in and he makes it funnier and better when he shows up.

Akiva Schaffer is less in front of the camera. He is more of a writer and a director, but I pretty much like everything he does as well. I kind of enjoyed "The Watch", which he directed and whenever he directed an episode of "SNL", I could tell it was his because it was extra funny. He happens to be my favorite rapper of the three of them too. But, nothing compares to Shaeffer directing for "Hot Rod". I love, love, love this movie. It is so weird and goofy and absurd and hilarious, all at the same time. Schaffer directed this movie to perfection. He had all the actors, be it Samberg, Taccone, Danny McBride, Bill Hader, Ian McShane and even Isla Fisher, act as bizarre and as absurd as they could and they knock it out of the park. I will defend "Hot Rod" until the day I die. It is one of my all time favorite movies. It is so odd, but so damn good.

All this though, brings me back to "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping". Schaffer directs and acts in the movie and Taccone and Samberg, more so Samberg, star in the movie. As I said before, Samberg is playing a version of Justin Bieber, but he plays it hilariously. The trailer is only two minutes, but I was able to glean from it that Connor4Real is a spoiled star and he's been that way since he was a baby. There's a scene in the trailer that shows him drumming like a pro, but he is a baby that can't even keep his head up straight. It is so funny. Connor is also a brat with an entourage that never says anything bad to him, or tell him no. He has so many people working for him and they are all yes men and women. Another scene shows him shooting baskets, he takes a no look shot, misses terribly, but everyone there tells him he made it. Again, hilarious. Joan Cusack plays his over bearing "momager" and she seems like she will be great in her role. Sarah Silverman is his publicist, and she looks super funny as well.

But, it is all about the Lonely Island guys. Samberg plays the title role and he is going to nail it. I just know he will because he is a good actor and he is a hilarious actor and this role is perfect for his comedy and his acting. I'm so excited to see him totally nail the role. Schaffer and Taccone are also super funny in the trailer as his childhood friends and future bandmates. Taccone plays his DJ who is just coasting on his friends fame. He too is a yes man and he also follows and does anything Connor tells him to do. He is the quintessential friend that is just happy to be involved and will do anything to stay friends with his ultra famous childhood friend. Schaffer plays a character that is in the boyband when they are younger, but he then moves to the woods and becomes Connor's songwriter. The scene where they show him in his woodshop, wearing all kinds of Carhartt gear, with a humongous beard, holding a birdhouse, is so funny. The screen flashes the words, "And his songwriter", and that's the next thing we see. It cracks me up every time.

As I'm sure you gathered by now, I am so, so pumped to see this movie. This has replaced all the other movies that I was excited to see. I'm still excited to see them, but not as excited as I am about "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping". This has all the makings of a classic for me. It has over the top, silly humor. It will be raunchy and it stars three of my favorite comic actors, writers and directors working in Hollywood right now. I cannot wait for this movie and I will see it opening day, no matter what the critical reviews are. The critics hated "Hot Rod", but I love that movie and I saw it twice in the theaters. So, "Popstar" will be seen at least once by me in the theaters.

That's a promise I can, and will, easily fulfill.

Ty

Ty is the Pop Culture editor for SeedSing and the other host of the X Millennial Man Podcast. He likes to dance in his underwear while he watches Saturday Night Live, sadly we have no recording of his moves. Follow Ty on twitter @tykulik.